Jakey’s Corner
By Sean O’Donnell
Episode 12 - Ami Walks--Finger Talks
Hey Folks! Well wasn’t that precious? I hope none of ya are allergic to fur because there sure were bushels of it flying last night. Hell that was the best cat fight since Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Hillary Duff and Lindsey Lohann were locked in the same room at the Grammys. And how about Ami’s exit? It was reminiscent of big Tom’s departure from SAS. A new low in Survivor history, she became the first woman to flip the bird as a departing statement. Tsk tsk! It was a good episode and one that was chockfull of interesting and downright funny quotes. So let’s start the dissection.
Well it got ugly very fast with Ami lashing out at Twila for going back on her word. Ami rides a high broom when she tries to call into question their true feelings for Eliza. Eliza pipes up at Ami –“Well who saved my ass tonight when I really was going to go home?” Twila raises her hand and Ami goes off on another rant about not respecting Twila and all such blather. Scout tries to come to Twila’s defense accusing Ami of pontificating. Twila tells Ami that she has acted so high and mighty and Ami agrees she got a bit cocky but she is one of the most caring, giving and loving people-Yada yada yada.
Oh Puullleeeze honey –give it up! This sequence had me frothing at the mouth and screaming at the screen for Twila to bitch slap that spoiled brat. Menu please! What cheese goes well with Queeny’s whine?
The next morning Twila picks up tree mail which announces reward challenge as: “Today you’ll push your limits of swimming, balance and diving. A test of will and stamina for the last six still surviving. A game changing reward with rejuvenating power for your body, fuel for your soul and a hot relaxing shower.”
After hearing that they all go nuts and Twila says she hopes Eliza wins because she has turned into a little stick body. Eliza shows off her back and shoulder blades as she begs to be chosen to go for food. Yikes!
They gather at the appointed beach and are shocked to see Jeff drive up in a nice new car which he informs them will go to the winner of the challenge. Also he explains that the second and third place people will also get to go with the winner to an island hotel where they will be able to eat and drink to their heart’s content and get a nice night’s sleep and a precious shower. Multiple Ohhs and aws!
In order to win they had to perform in a grueling challenge that entailed making their way over outriggers, platforms and balance beams to a floating platform from which they had to dive and swim to their designated buoys from which a submerged line held three flags. They were to gather their flags one at time, with the first person to finish winning the car.
This was a close race between Eliza and Ami for first place and Chris and Julie battling for 3rd spot. Ami had a substantial lead but had several stumbles and an amazing show of stamina led to a well deserved win for Eliza. The battle for 3rd spot was similar with Julie having problems in the home stretch and losing to Chris by mere seconds. So off Eliza, Chris and Ami go in the new car. Hat’s off to Scout who really took a pounding in this challenge but kept going like that crazy pink energizer bunny.
The reward was certainly enjoyed by these 3, with a shower being the first order of business. Unfortunately for Chris, the ladies didn’t leave him any hot water. While Chris was in the shower, Ami started the process of trying to woo Eliza back to her side. Chris joins them and they enjoy the sights and drinks. They get serenaded by an island troupe who sounded like the Chipmunks! Remember Alvin and the Chipmunk Xmas song? Any way, it was all good.
Meanwhile the walk back to camp Alinta brought out the bitterness in Scout over the ravages of time on her body. There was a day when she would have kicked ass in that challenge. Yeah, yeah and I make Brad Pitt look like the hunchback of Notre Dame. In any event, both Twila and Scout are worried that Ami will really be working on Eliza to change her loyalties. They think she is solid but who can say for sure.
The show turns back to the reward winners enjoying dinner and Ami advising Chris and Eliza it might be in their best interests to break up Twila and Scout. With that she gets away from the table to allow them to talk about it. Chris tells Eliza there is no way they should allow Ami back in since if they end up in F4 with Twila and Scout, they would be in pretty good shape. Ami continues to try and guilt out Eliza when they go to bed. Ami keeps harping on how she has saved Eliza about 5 million times---my my she does exaggerate!! More important though is the vote that would have ended Eliza’s game. Where will this end? Hmmnn.
When they get back to camp, Twila is still worried about the pressure that Ami must have put on her and it certainly looks as if it has paid off. Ami has Julie and Eliza with her in the shelter doing the eyebrow/groom thing when Scout says she is going to get firewood. The sorority Queen, Ami, tells her it will take all 3 of them to tend to the water pot and such. As Scout hobbles off, Ami gives a little wave in her direction. I’m sorry but –this is a totally evil, self absorbed little spoiled snot in need of a severe case of whoop ass.
While Scout is on her wood patrol Ami continues to hold court over her minions. She is totally ruthless and uncaring in her words and treatment of Scout, going so far as to not allowing her to even touch one of their blankets. They continue to butt heads and Ami while having lost all respect for Twila really wants to send Scout a message by voting for her at TC. She even evokes shades of Heidi as she goes into an older woman being jealous of the younger more beautiful woman comparison of herself and Scout. Chris in the meantime is just watching the show, he has ceased to exist as this alley cat showers her arrogant bilge on the other women.
Ok! Thankfully it is time for the Immunity challenge. One more minute of watching Ami would not have been good for the health of my TV or my cats’ nerves. They hate the sound of shattering glass.
Oh freakin great! The Immunity Challenge is basically a form of shuffle board! Where did they dig this up? On a golden age cruise ship? I dunno but I really think the tougher challenges should be for immunity and the softer ones left for reward. Shuffle board for gawd’s sakes! Ok! Ok ! Each player was given 5 pucks. The object of the game was to try and land as many pucks as possible on the islands of Vanuatu represented on the board. If one of the pucks came to rest in a volcanic depression, it was safe. Players could try to knock other players’ pucks off the islands also. Big Deal! It was close but Ami knocked one of her own pieces off allowing Chris to win. Case closed.
Chris is surprised but happy at winning the mickey mouse non physical challenge. He can just duck and enjoy the fireworks. Eliza and Twila have another talk and Twila again tries to reassure Eliza that she is solid. Ami tries the, 5 million times I saved you, line on Eliza again. She says her feeling would be hurt if Eliza voted for her and all such nonsense.
Chris and Twila talk while on a firewood drag. Chris is sure that Eliza wouldn’t dare risk a tie vote and the stupid possibilities it would entail. According to Chris, if there is a tie: everyone votes again and if the tie still stands then the 2 people who are tied get immunity and the others have to pull rocks from a bag and whoever gets the colored rock is out. Now that sucks in so many ways and time zones as to be absolutely preposterous and it remains as one of the most moronic aspects of the whole process. I’m not gonna rant and rave but Jeez Louise! MB wake the hell up and change this nonsense for the next series!
Oh boy –it’s a meeting of the sorority chicks at the fish pond. How quaint! Julie and Eliza discuss Scout again and Eliza seems to be wavering. Hmmnn
Time for TC. Ami is first on Jeff’s list and admits to being shocked at the vote to boot off Leann. Jeff then asks Scout why Chris is still there when she had insisted earlier on in the game that she wanted the women to stay united. She replied that the merge brought about different factors and the game had to be changed. Jeff went for the jugular when he told Scout that it seemed the women power thing was only a matter of her own convenience and when it didn’t suit her any further, she changed tactics. Next Ami says how disgusted she was by Twila’s tactics. Twila gets her shot in when she tells Ami “I’m not the only person who has lied in this game. Get over it, grow up and get on with it, you’ve been had, screw you.” Ah! I just love the art of diplomacy! Ami is still hung up about Twila’s swearing on her son’s name and how she couldn’t do that for a Gazillion dollars. Jeez this chick likes to toss the high numbers around. She should go on the Apprentice and barista coffee for The Donald.
The final round of questions was for Eliza when Jeff asked if Ami was spouting sour grapes. Eliza thought she may have some justification to be bitter. Yikes! Also she found it hard to vote off Leann and thinks of Ami as a big sister which brought a boo hoo moment from Eliza and Ami. I suspect Eliza’s tears were genuine but Ami shut down the waterworks in a NY nanosecond. Better brush up on your act girl!
Now for the vote and some of the pithiest lines ever.
Twila votes for Ami saying: “ Drama Queen to the end!”
Ami votes for Scout saying: “ Scout, you are pretty good hiding your nasty side but when your true colors come out they are no part of any rainbow I’ve seen”
Scout votes for Ami saying “Ami, Queens get dethroned and lightning will strike a lone tree on a mountain top faster than anything”
The other votes were not shown but I held my breath when Jeff got to the final and deciding ballot. I was pretty sure that Eliza was smart enough to see the way but----. And it appeared she was as Jeff announced Ami as the 13 person to be voted out. As her torch was being snuffed she wished the youngins well, gave Jeff a look that would freeze the nuts off the Golden Gate Bridge and the coup de grace came as she reached the path she raised her right arm and flipped the bird (CBS tried to blur it but it was unmistakable). Charming!
Ami was a helluva competitor in the challenges and was one of the strongest women ever seen on Survivor. It was hers for the taking but for an incredibly stupid decision to keep Chris instead of Eliza. It is aggravating to see strong people like Leann and Ami out while Scout still remains but that is part of the game and the cost for a dumb strategy move.
Ami’s true colors came out as they most often do when people face adversity. What we saw was pretty ugly in my opinion. I saw an arrogant, obnoxious, vain, petulant, petty spoiled brat who dropped her mask when things got beyond her ability to manipulate. Her behavior tonight warrants a hall of shame nomination. Twila was right when she called on her to Grow up and get on with it. A giving, caring and sharing person she called herself. Hmmnnn. Certainly not in the brief time I saw her on Survivor. The rest of her life will remain to verify that. I wish her well.
So we’re down to 5 and anything can still happen especially now that a tie vote is not a factor. Will the alliance hold? Can Julie break in? Will someone crack under the pressure? Jeff warned after this TC: The frayed nerves and tension will only get worse. I bet!
Don’t miss the View where you can catch our panels’ latest and greatest observations on the game and where it is headed in the home stretch.
Cheers
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